Grieving with Hope • Journaling, Poetry and Lament

GRIEVING WITH HOPE

There are times in our lives when we mourn and grieve, but it is important not to lose hope. Those of us who know Jesus cling to an everlasting hope.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Because of his great mercy, he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead and into an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you. (1 Peter 1:3-4)

On November 30, 2019, at age 29, my oldest son was called to join the cloud of witnesses who have gone ahead to be with Jesus. He lost his fight with muscular dystrophy and congestive heart failure. Because God is faithful, I know my son is with Him, and I will see him again. One day, God will wipe away our tears, and we will have joy as we've never known.

GRIEVING IS A PROCESS

We may think that we should get over our grief quickly, but grief is something we have to work through, and it cannot be rushed. It would be easy to let depression keep us down, but we can also lament our losses to God.

Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never allow the righteous to be shaken. (Psalm 55:22)

Give God your burdens
Though you fall, you won’t stay down
His strength sustains you

JOURNALING IN THE PSALMS

The Psalms are full of laments. Usually starting with sorrow, a lament often turns as the psalmist remembers all God has done, and ends with praise.

A couple of weeks before we lost our son, I began using a new journal as I read through the Psalms. It would become a comfort in the early days after his death.

The death of his faithful ones is valuable in the Lord’s sight. (Psalm 116:15)

For this psalm to show up in my reading the morning after my son’s death had to be God’s perfect timing.

USING A JOURNAL

Using a journal is a good way to meditate on scripture and respond to it with your thoughts. I highly recommend it. What you use for a journal doesn't matter. It can be fancy or just a simple notebook. It can even be a document on your computer, though I like a tangible reminder as I use different materials.

I've used washi tape and stickers to decorate and divide this page. Choosing which stickers and tape to use and arranging them on the page is also part of my devotional time. My creativity can be an act of worship, too.

POETRY HELPS WITH GRIEF

My first journal ran out of pages on December 26. In my next one, I decided to write a haiku each day based on the scheduled psalm reading.

I’m sharing these with you because I would like to encourage you to turn to the Psalms for comfort and to journal your thoughts in response.

Maybe you could write your own haiku. You may say, "But I’m not a poet, I can’t do that." I encourage you to try.

Haiku is a Japanese form of poetry originally about nature that can be written about any subject. It has three lines, five syllables in the first line, seven in the second, and five in the third. I have included some of my haiku in this post.

WRITE YOUR OWN HAIKU

First, read a Psalm (or another scripture passage). Then, pick out one or more verses that stand out to you. Write the verses in your journal or on a piece of paper. Take time to meditate on the passage, particularly on your chosen verses.

Write out your thoughts as they come to you. Those thoughts can be the basis for your haiku. As you review what you have written, see if you can arrange words and phrases to fit the haiku pattern. I sometimes use a separate paper to write out my initial ideas so I can have a finished haiku in my journal, but you might want to do all of it in your journal.

It’s okay if you don’t write a haiku. The purpose is to allow Scripture to speak to you and respond with your thoughts. Sometimes, if I have a lot to say, I write two stanzas—sometimes only one. It really doesn’t matter. Here’s an example along with the source verses from Psalm 62 (5-6, 8):

Rest in God alone, my soul, for my hope comes from him.  He alone is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I will not be shaken. Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts before him. God is our refuge.                                                                                                                                                               

My soul rests in God
Only He can meet my needs
He hears my heart’s cry

In God I have hope
Because of Him I stand firm
He is trustworthy

GRIEVE AND MOURN, BUT ALWAYS HOPE

May your faithful love rest on us, Lord, for we put our hope in you. (Psalm 33:22)

Let your faithful love
Come rest upon us always
Lord, we hope in you

As we grieve and mourn, let us also remember to encourage each other, to look for the joy in life no matter where we are, and to put our hope and trust in the God who loves us. If you create a poem, we would love for you to share it in the comments.

Questions For Reflection

1.  How do you find comfort and hope when you are grieving? Do you acknowledge and feel your grief, try to ignore it, or try to get over it quickly?

2.  Meditate on Psalm 62:7-8. Journal your thoughts as you grieve, then pour out your heart to God.

3.  Meditate on 2 Corinthians 1:3-4. When you find comfort, how can you share the comfort you have received with others who are grieving?